Influence Others, Release the Outcome

Your role is influence — the results aren’t yours to hold.

Last night, I received two true gifts — the gift of real, tender, totally unsolicited conversations with individuals who simply wanted me to listen to what was on their hearts. After they shared with me, they asked questions like, “What do you think?” and “What’s your opinion?”

In those moments, I paused and responded with words of encouragement: “That must be hard to watch, especially with someone you love,” and “Oh, thank you for sharing — that’s a beautiful story.” Because I was asked for my thoughts, I did share them. I offered gentle reminders such as, “Your heart is in the right place, but remember, you cannot control what others do or how they respond to what you’re asking of them. Say what’s on your mind, take care of you, and then let it go.”

To the other individual, I offered simple encouragement to release the outcome to God and to ask Him for the right words to speak into someone’s life, if that was His will.

After both conversations, I paused and wondered why these two individuals chose me to share such tender things with. They know little about me or my life. The only thing that came to mind were the shorter, lighter conversations we’d had before — moments where I simply listened to what was on their hearts and didn’t tell them what to do because they hadn’t asked. I didn’t consider either conversation an inconvenience but rather a gift — a sign that someone found me trustworthy enough to be vulnerable with. I simply offered my time without judgement.

All this said, releasing outcomes was the guidance I offered both of them. You can influence others with your words and actions, but what they choose for themselves is not up to us. It’s the same timeless wisdom we all need to remember. We must let go of our desire to change others’ behaviors. No matter how long we live, the pain often lies in resisting the truth that those we love must make their own choices. Complete surrender is a worthy goal to strive for throughout our lives… and all we can do is make progress toward it while we’re here. It’s part of our human experience.

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With grace and gratitude,

Cindy

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