Processing Unexpected Happenings and Death

Grieving an Important Loss

Many of us have gotten a call or news face‑to‑face that was sudden, shocking. News that takes your breath away, makes your chest feel heavy, feels mentally overwhelming and hard to digest. Emotions go wild—anger, disbelief, unbearable sadness, even numbness. It’s hard to take in things that are hard. It’s a huge reminder of how powerless and out of control we really are.

A family friend died recently in an accident. I’m sure he didn’t leave his home that morning thinking it would be his last day on earth, yet it was. Upon hearing the news, tears and sadness welled up, but one of my initial reflexes is to push them back down because it’s so hard to feel those feelings. They are incredibly uncomfortable. I went to bed that night thinking about his family—his wife, adult children, and the grandchildren left behind. I tossed and turned, woke up with some anxiety sweats, and in my head blamed it on the humid temps and hot summer weather. I arose, prayed, showered, and headed off to work. That would surely distract me and I’d feel better after.

I got off work, came home, and not too long after, those feelings reappeared with greater intensity. You see, I’d lost my dad at about the same age this family did. His death was not accidental, but after hearing news of his cancer diagnosis, it only took about four months until he passed. While the situations were completely different, as an empath by nature, it was like I was feeling the pain all over again. My tears flowed because I could remember my own loss and grief and how heartbreaking it was to lose a parent, and I disliked the thought of the family members of the man who lost his life in the accident having to feel similar things. I was reminded of how hard it is to lose those we love, and it can often be harder yet to hear of others going through similar feelings of loss. There are no words for this kind of loss…only tears and prayers.

Today, I woke up in a better frame of mind and thought of this man that passed and all the kindness, steadiness, and support he provided to me when I was going through a particularly hard time earlier in life. I also remembered the childhood memories of our parents and his parents being friends, and of us hanging out as children on our respective farms. All the memories…and again I was reminded of how powerless I am, yet reminded of how mighty God is.

Yesterday, a friend sent me a song called Thy Will Be Done by Hillary Scott & the Scott Family. A beautiful song reminding me that we cannot always understand His ways, but we can trust in His purpose and plan. The link to the song is here: Hillary Scott & The Scott Family - Thy Will (Lyric Video)

Grateful for the memories and the example both this man and my own father lived out. Rest in Peace.

With Grace and Gratitude,

Cindy

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